For those of you who may have wondered why I have been strangely quiet recently... it's not due to any sadness or whatnot, but is down to the fact that I couldn't actually speak after having all four wisdom teeth whipped out. I looked like a hybrid between a square faced hamster, and Eddy Murphy in the nutty professor...like this:
AMAZEBALLS NO?? In actual factualness, my face looked like this...
sooooooo sadddddddd and beyond ridiculous. I hope you all had a good laugh at that. Unfortunately every time I looked in the mirror I was very conscious of how hilarious I looked, which made me start laughing, which just hurt my mouth a lot. So it was a bit of a pickle really. Hilariousness vs pain.
I would like to take this opportunity to tell everyone how really quite not that horrific taking your wisdom teeth out is. I put it off for over two years, due to all the absolutely vile stories people told me about the whole procedure, meanwhile my teeth got all crooked cause apparently there just isn't enough space in my little mouth for all that teeth (insert dirty joke here). And at the end of it all... it was TOTES FINE. I think it's all about your state of mind, and of course having a calm and skilled dental surgeon is a bonus. So for anyone needing to take their wisdom teeth out, DO IT NOW. And then you can look like a hamster, take a week off work, and eat nothing but soup and mash potatoes (so you end up looking like a fat hamster head on a toothpick body) THE BENEFITS JUST NEVER END!
At some point during the week of never leaving home, lying in bed re-watching 30 Rock, eating mash and feeling sorry for my square face, I had a visit from my chum Janna. She is a bit of a globe trotter, and after her trip to Thailand a few years ago, returned with some awesomesauce cloth boots. Obvz I was very upset that she didn't think to bring me back a pair, and tried very hard to persuade her she would simply NEVER be able to wear them in England as it's too wet, they would be better off left in Cyprus under my watchful eye. That failed. Luckily, being the jet-set backpacker that she is, decided on a whim to go back to Thailand this year for Christmas on the beach. Cause that's just how she rolls, innit. I was pretty pissed that she wasn't coming back here, choosing tropical paradise and buckets of vodka and ephedrine filled redbull over Xmas in Cyprus, but oh well. LUCKILY she managed to pull it back in her favour when she not only made a spontaneous trip to Cy, but on top of that.... Brought me my own pair of super awesomesaucementalcakes boots!! Behold their splendour....
Pretty amaze no?? I have worn them once so far, but I am just dreaming up different outfit combos to pair them with to inundate your senses with. Powwww!